About the Book
This site exists alongside a book — a personal account of my wife’s and my journey through infertility.
The book holds the story in full: one continuous arc rather than a collection of observations. It follows the experience from the inside, including the waiting, the repetition, the imbalance of roles, and the slow erosion of certainty that comes when outcomes remain out of reach.
Where the site isolates and names specific dynamics, the book carries the weight of living through them over time.
It is not instructional.
It does not offer closure.
It does not resolve cleanly.
The book is written from the partner’s perspective — not to correct the imbalance of attention infertility creates, but to document it honestly.
Many readers come to the book because they are navigating infertility themselves.
Others come to it because someone they love is — and they want to understand without asking the wrong questions or offering the wrong reassurance.
The book is not meant to explain infertility clinically.
It is meant to be accurate.
For some readers, that accuracy becomes a way of standing closer to someone they love.
For others, it becomes a record of an experience they did not expect to change them as much as it did.
Our Story
Due Date Unknown comes out of years spent trying to build a family in ways we did not expect.
What began as a straightforward hope became a long stretch of infertility — marked by IVF cycles, waiting periods, medical language we had to learn quickly, and repeated moments where effort and outcome refused to line up.
My wife carried the physical and emotional weight of treatment: appointments, procedures, medications, and the constant recalibration of hope. I stood beside her as the partner — trying to be supportive, capable, and steady, while absorbing the uncertainty and helplessness that infertility imposes on those who can’t directly fix what’s happening.
When infertility narrowed our options further, we turned to surrogacy — a path that brought its own complexity, gratitude, vulnerability, and loss of control. Surrogacy did not erase the years that came before it, nor did it restore certainty. It required trust in another person, patience with new layers of waiting, and the humility to accept help where independence had once felt essential.
The book follows this shared experience honestly — infertility, IVF, surrogacy, and the long middle where nothing is guaranteed. It examines how unevenly these burdens are carried inside a marriage, how roles harden under pressure, and how love persists even as the future remains undefined.
There is no attempt to turn the story into a lesson or a redemption arc.
The book doesn’t rush toward resolution or clean meaning.
It simply records what it was like to live through a season where becoming parents required surrendering control, enduring uncertainty, and trusting others — all while learning how to stay connected to each other in the process.
Want to Read More?
If you’re looking for the longer version of this work — held in one place — this is where it lives.